Wednesday, February 02, 2005

Snowbabies

Snowbabies

You know, I learned to dislike Yorkshire and it's people from reading James Herriot's books, but dislike was all it was, a mild distaste, like taking a sip of coffee and finding out that it has gone cold. I am slowly coming to the conclusion that this place harbors a den of insipid morons bent on boring me to death. When you publish a Blog you are telling the surfing world that you have something to say, and that it is worth our while to leave all the cool things out there to come look at what you have to say. If all that comes from your brain is utter tedious shit, don't blame me for saying so. Your family and your pets are of no interest to anyone, though traffic whore hypocrites who want you to link back to them will pretend that they are. Of course you don't mind though, since you are shallow and incapable of deep thought or emotions yourself. This Blog is worthless, and so is anyone who thinks (or pretends to think) it is not. E-

Star-Dom

Star-Dom

You know, I was just about to take a break, get a little rest from from all the nothingness when I found this. Again, exact quotes here:

"Elena aka Star. 26. Romanian. Resides in Canada. 5 foot 1 inches tall with shoulder length brown hair & brown eyes. Sarcastic, perverted, extrovert, crazy, wild, narcisit, perfectionist, funny, outgoing, friendly, inpatient, slightly childish & very stubburn."

Now you are Romanian, so I allow for the bad spelling, but you posted 329 words on getting your nails done, and before that 384 words on The Apprentice. You are unquestionably the most trivial person I have come across so far. No, you are nowhere near deep enough to be "perverted" or "wild", and typing LOL does not mean you are funny, in fact it means exactly the opposite. My experience is that people who type "LOL" are anything but funny. Maybe you were funny in Romania.

I think you talk a lot. A whole fucking lot. I think you habitually yammer on till your empty head runs out of words and you just start the thread over again repeating everything you just said. You are exactly that kind of woman. E-

Tuesday, February 01, 2005

What the...!

What the...!

Damn, this man is boring. All you boring, tacky, mediocre people (you know who you are, because I've told you) go to his site and bookmark it. Don't even bother reading before you do, this one is for you. Thank me later. You know, I don't really have Internet access, I can't read Fark or Yahoo News for myself, I rely on fucking idiot Bloggers to rip stuff off and post it. Thank you so very much.

"While my Wife ran to my cousin's house I opened up Storm 3.0 and tried my hand at a rock song.
Fell free to give me some constructive criticism!"

I don't even have to listen. It's repetitive, simple, and unoriginal, like you. As for this "Wife" of yours, mail-order bride? Severe facial scars? A cripple of some kind? An ugly crippled mail-order bride? I'm trying to find a reason for your marriage. Help me out here. She "ran" did she? I figure she could either be as tedious as you are, or simply desperate. Of course, looking back at that, it could be that "Wife" is the name of your dog.

Clearly smoking medical weed isn't helping you (something terminal perhaps? Hmmm? :-)). You have nothing to say and I'm too bored to go on. F

This 'n' That

This 'n' That

"You won't like or agree with everything I say but we can agree to disagree!"
We can, but let's not. You poor, simpering, utterly ordinary, wretch. I am almost moved to pity by your site. I like to think that someone is playing a practical joke on me with this one. Someone wants a little traffic and and has gotten their website all retarded just for me! I'll play along, good sport that I am :-) see? I'm smiling, that's my little smiley face right there :-) Isn't it cute? My little cutey face! You need to have your tubes tied, woman. If you're old, or they've already been tied, then someone needs to build me a time machine. The world does not need any more of you. Hell, even your imbecile-convention of a Tag Board is amusing. Yes, amusing, like that other defect from Sunday. I feel slightly sorry for you, and I did laugh, so... C

Monday, January 31, 2005

Jay Sheer

Jay Sheer

Now for the most pathetic man on the Internet. From the Blog (copied and pasted, not my spelling):
"There are a lot of emotions that go along with a divorce. There is the quite regret of a relationship that fizzled out when it started with the dream of forever."
"You see...my soon to be ex had one serious flaw...she had absolutely no restraint when it came to money."
"Thank you for giving up on the marriage, Barbara. It was probably the nicest thing you have ever done for me."

So you married a gold-digger, she sucked you dry and then dumped you, but if you had just grown a pair you might have been able to rein in her spending habit, gotten the respect of your wife, and maybe saved your marriage. Sound right? Good, I'll continue then...so instead of actually doing something, you ate yourself into obesity and fretted about debts being paid from your meager income. "Nebbish", there's a word for you, Mr Sheer. E

Toast99 (again)

Toast99 (again)

Anyway, this is a different site by a guy I reviewed way back in last week.
Honestly, I don't quite know what to make of it. It freaked me out when I first came up on it, then I saw the teeth, then the eyes, it's a good thing I wasn't drunk. Why would anyone put this on the Internet? I'm serious, man. If she's so lovely, why are you hiding her? This looks like that Sigourney Weaver alien under a mosquito net. Just grinning at me. "Lovely" as compared to Evander Holyfield, maybe? Can't tell from this pic. Anyway there is nothing else here to rate. E

Yorkie Snowman

Yorkie Snowman

Some idiot on somebody's comments pointed out that I seem to bash women for the most part, that's because airhead women like to listen to their own vapid thoughts, and are more deluded and pretentious than airhead men, who just go to NASCAR events and hunt deer. Airhead women like to listen to themselves talk. Notably, however, most of the men I bash are British. Make of that what you will.

Here we go with another winner from the Queen's anus: This Blog will get a D+ because it really isn't much of anything except boring. It's a Blog about the fucking weather. He takes shallow pictures of boring things and puts them on the Web for us to see, thanks, boring-ass Yorkie dude! We need you! None of us have digital cameras, we rely on you to show us what we can see for ourselves! D+

Oh, and WT girl, thanks for misquoting me to make yourself look better. Maybe you'll change it now, or maybe not. I win either way.

Sunday, January 30, 2005

Chelle-Belle

Chelle-Belle

Hold on, I'm thinking of a way to call this woman white-trash while being politically correct. I'll come up with something in a minute.
I'll give a certain amount of credit for her template being well thought out, organized. She helpfully links to a bunch of Blogs that I already hate, just looking at their titles. The things you like reading are a reflection of your own personality. Of course, it is all excessive, it's how they are. I'm guessing she came from a poor, probably rural background, the affectations in her writing, the picture of their new car, it all says, "Shee-it! I got me some money!" Note all the references to money, buying, things bought, and the lack of anything thought...low-grade human being all the way, baby. E